Wednesday, November 23, 2011

some words......

Haven’t been writing too much on here lately…


Once
A long ago I asked Mark Gonzalez to paint me a painting, he turned to me and explained that for him, painting has to done be done at the right time, the right time being a time when he is inspired to paint. I’ve always held onto this moment I shared with him. I was young and a fan of Mark, and I just wanted some artwork of his to hang on the wall. The crazy thing was Mark had come to visit me, to skate my ramp, and to just hang out. This would be a dream for most skaters, and it was for me, but somehow the idea of him making me a painting was like some sort of stamp that would solidify this new friendship. Looking back I realize how much I wanted from people in my early 20’s. The man-child times of my life could be so damn confusing. I think Mark saw that I was some sort of idiot savant…. I locked myself in my warehouse and just skated. I over focused on it, ate right, stayed in shape and obsessed over skating. It was pure and from my heart, but in ways it was almost sick. A young man should live and let the world challenge him, but my challenge was skating and pushing myself. I would travel far and wide in those days but it was more just to get to skate something new, it was foolish of me not to see the experience of travel in a bigger picture. It took me a long time to find myself and to let me be myself. It took distancing myself from skateboarding for a certain amount of time, it took me submerging myself in night school classes, and a huge awakening was learning how to build my first motorcycle from the ground up. It was me alone in the garage struggling mostly, fucking things up at times and succeeding at times. It was a proper and much needed balance. Though it was just about a decade ago, it was a different time as far as building a bike goes, now there is such a network through the computer with other chopper enthusiasts, and “how to” information. I see nothing wrong with this, and to judge it would only point out my age and insecurity. But I would never change a thing about the way I got to experience my first build. I was inspired by others at the time, but you know there is that feeling when something really finds you that is so deep, it’s like falling in love, it’s unexplainable. It grabs you by the heart and by the nuts and it drags you around. It’s someone else’s first rock show that made them become a musician…or the first time you held a spray can to a wall and you knew you wanted to be an artist, maybe a photographers first look behind a lens. That feeling when those chills run up the back of your neck and into your brain, and you look around and ask your self if this is an ok place to scream at the top of your lungs. And when you get it, you are just so thankful it found you. It may not be forever, it may transfer to something else, but you welcome it and you grab onto it. For me it’s been skateboarding and motorcycles…. I don’t have to prove it by saying for LIFE, it’s just the things that have found me. I’m not just passing through, but at anytime I would welcome something that would challenge me and consume me the way that they have. It is a personal trip…and we are individuals, no matter how hard others will try to box you in. Recently I had an older friend that I look up to tell me “you know man I just can’t figure you out”…. I took it as kind of odd when he said it because, first off what the fuck are you doing trying to figure out someone you have already accepted as a friend. Days later looking back on it I took it as a compliment. I don’t really want to be “figured out”. I enjoy individuals that keep me guessing and surprise me. Shit I can’t figure myself out most days. I’m the only one that lives inside this head/body so I don’t think anyone can truly figure anyone else out. I couldn’t really figure Mark out back then, and why he just couldn’t paint me a painting on the spot. Now of course I get it and the lesson is learned. The funny thing is Mark and I skated my ramp that night like two men gone mad. I tucked myself into bed that night around 11:00pm and at 6:30am I heard a tapping on my door…..
“hey Maxi, I made something for you” mark whispered

when I went downstairs Mark had painted me a painting on the wall next to my ramp. It was fucking giant. Ten feet high and about Twenty four feet wide. After our skate he was feeling inspired. Thanks for the lesson Mark.




33 comments:

scotthn said...

best thibg ive read in a long time! thanks!
-Scott

Sheabones said...

Inspiration is contagious. Thanks for spreading it around!

Alberto said...

Ho capito la metà di quello che c'è scritto, ma resta comunque una figata.

Grazie Max.

lifeisfuct-diekruzen HEAVY KLOTHING said...

i get it

keithybloodygeorge said...

.....don't try and understand me, i'm a fucking enigma....

Jet City Jughead said...

The older I get, the more I appreciate people’s uncompromising commitment to their art, sport or cause. I don’t always agree with it, I often think it’s a waste of time, and I sure don’t claim to understand it, but I appreciate it.

Good words Max. Hope all is well.
Anthony

oldirtybenson said...

Speaking of getting those "chills" - just got em reading that. These are always my favorite posts...thanks

max schaaf said...

thank---yous

zack said...

good stuff Max. and what ever happened to that painting?

max schaaf said...

still got it

Spence said...

Words of wisdom. Who'd of thunk. Thanks.

Anonymous said...

Pisces are commercial grade, industrial strength complicated, yo.
Some people see stuff, walk by and say, "huh". While the cursed and obsessed see stuff and say, "Whoa, I must disect and digest this entire unit on a molecular level".
The sign is two fish forever swimming in opposite directions.

BUZZARDSALINAS said...

wow...thanx fir sharing

Jon said...

Awesome writing Max! Tracker and Indy. Haha. I miss being a kid that doesnt care that just loves skateboarding. I had a porsche poster next to my skate photos too. Ha.

13luckymonkey@gmail.com said...

\m/ ax great read. Thank you

jonathan arrien said...

i pleasure to read you max.

greetings from the basque country.

Anonymous said...

Additional generic thanks comment!

Chris Wellard Tattoo said...

thx for sharing max.
much respect from toronto!

*ch.

Shrewgy said...

Love it when you write.

molly bg said...

Good words. Like the intro photo. I've always thought you were so cool.

Sean said...

I always love a good gonz story.

matt machine said...

nice one mate.

Gregor said...

Perfect.

SOTW said...

Hey that was great, really inspiring, thanks for writing it.

leon said...

killer post!

Justin said...

I always wondered what the story behind that painting was. Thanks for sharing.

MARTY BAPTIST said...

STOKED,inspiring stuff.thankyou

Initials BB said...

Love it. Excellent writing style too, totally succinct.

chrisrosehart said...

I couldn't sleep and decided to look at your blog, since it's been quite some time I even entered into the blogspot world.

This is one of the most honest writings I have read in a long time.

A good mind fuck.
And now I am completely awake.

"Daddyfrisco" Ray said...

Inspired on the thoughts, experienced in a different turn. Great write Max!

Anonymous said...

good stuff max, always something eye-opening to check here.- rob

DeVillier said...

Never met Gonz, the dude is one of my heroes. Hope youre good bud.

lightly salted surf shop said...

fuck yes.